Personal Development Hack 133: How to Win any Argument?

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One of the most difficult situations to find yourself in is in an argument with someone so you must have wondered how to win any argument, especially when the argument is taking up quite a lot of your time and neither the other person is leaving you alone nor can you back out of it. Hence, in such situations, a person must be prepared to defend themselves and even win their argument so that they won’t have another regret in the line. 

But, why do we get so stubborn about some specific arguments? A simple explanation could be how some topics, projects, or contexts are close to our beliefs, values and experiences. Such that, when someone contradicts those beliefs, they unknowingly also threatens the others’ identity and sense of being.  

So, how to win any argument?  An effective hack could be to reframe the issue. As our beliefs are rooted in much larger context issues or ideologies, and threatening these for the sake of winning an argument may heat it up much more. It’s better to simply reframe the issue by separating their deep-rooted ideology from that issue. 

For example, if a person is in a climate crisis denial who’s making arguments for free trade and capitalism. Then, instead of making them see the facts related to increased sea level or ozone layer holes. It’s better to start your explanation with evidence that shows that renewable energy could lead to better technology and economic growth.

Another method to make a powerful impact during an argument is to appeal to an alternative identity of the individual by making them realize that even though one aspect of your argument might contradict them another aspect actually aligns with them. The major idea is to make them realize that they can change their mind on certain things. 

For example, if an employee is in an argument about delaying the project with his boss who has an ENTJ personality type, then instead of arguing about their judging personality aspect that involves preparing for things and sticking to plans and rules. The employee can appeal to the intuitive personality aspect of his/her boss where he/she appreciates innovation. Another effective application for this could be using subtle flattery, whenever you are in a heated conversation with another person.

Bonus tip: Other than these you should keep the following basic do’s and don’t in your mind during arguments:

S.No DO’s Don’t
1. Listen carefully Get personal
2. Ask questions  Get distracted
3. Study your opponent Add unambiguous arguments
4. Stay calm Contradict yourself
5. Use facts Jump into arguments without consideration


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