This personal development hack is applicable to all of us and the core question of how to make others like us is been questioned since early greek philosophers. One exceptional way is to nudge people to you. Nudges aim to influence the choices we make without taking away our power to choose. These are beneficial as we don’t always need to think logically while weighing all the costs and benefits.
So, how can you nudge people towards liking you? The answer is the psychological phenomenon known as the “Ben Franklin effect“, where Franklin himself had stated that “when you do someone a favor, you will eventually like them more than you did before ”.
The reason could be that our brain dislikes situations causing cognitive dissonance, that is, such situations where our beliefs and our actions don’t match up. Hence, if you do something nice for someone even if you don’t have positive feelings for them, your brain will begin to face the dissonance. And in order to reach homeostasis, by removing the dissonance. it would require you to alter such beliefs to match with the situation, hence, making us think that “I helped this other person so he must be a better person than what I thought earlier”.
However, a recent study proposes that this effect is not due to cognitive dissonance, rather it takes place because of the principle of reciprocity of liking, as the person who has been asked for a favor thinks that the other person is asking for a favor because they like them and therefore they should also reciprocate the feeling.
Regardless of the reason, it is clear that it can help you to nudge others to like you. Thereupon, you can use this psychological hack by asking a small favor from someone you want to like. And after providing you some help the Ben Franklin effect will nudge them to like you a little more than earlier. Remember, the favor you will ask should be a small favor that doesn’t cost a lot of resources or time from the other person so that they cannot reject helping you.
Furthermore, you can also use this personal development hack to make yourself like another person by helping them with something.